I tried every activity possible growing up, to keep me engaged; T-Ball, painting, cheerleading, violin, and even video games weren't enough to keep me active. So, I joined a circus. With my mother's permission of course.
That following Spring my sisters and I were each enrolled in one act. After a year, my mom joined our circus board and dad became a roust. Before we knew it, we were volunteering for anything with a sign-up sheet. Concessions, training assistance, stage set ups, costume crew, and even gym clean ups. Thankfully all the volunteering gave us enough credit to start joining more acts, allowing my sisters and I to further cultivate our talents.
My youngest sister Kimberly discovered that she was a strong hand balancer, earning herself a place in advanced hand balancing within her first few years. Our middle sister, Emilie, found that she was a well desired base for other ground acts. Leading her to an Acro coaching position, then stage management. Although I trained alongside my sisters in their acts, I belonged in the air.
I hadn’t noticed my strength or love for the air until I had a trainer push me. She would set challenges for me to complete, and each reward was for a higher spot in show. Moving me up to the top advanced aerial acts at the age of 14.
By high school my sisters and I were training until 10 PM Monday – Thursday, and volunteering Saturday-Sunday. We spent every waking moment putting our all into show prep for nine months of each year, then performing for two. With all this training we began to see our father less and less, causing him to feel as if he was just watching us grow. With much worry, he decided to join in on at least one act with each of my sisters and I. Not only allowing for him to spend time with us, but to also allowing him to participate in our growth. All the while, mom climbed the circus board ladder and even ran our concessions for about seven years. All together we turned circus into our second home, earning us a family award in 2009 for all our efforts.
Now like any family, there were ups and downs. Challenges/success, loss, and love. Despite it all, circus never failed to keep me grounded. Even when my family lost our self of identity, circus brought us back together. At some points, circus kept us alive.
It had the power to muffle the outside world and allow us to reach our true potential as artists.
By 2015, we were on our tenth year with what then turned into The Great Y Circus. It was also my graduating year, and I would be facing the decision to go pro, or go to school. I had everyone on my side supporting either of my decisions but then I fell. Twice.
Each fall left me with a serious injury and put a pause on my final year with my youth circus. The reality of our line of work scared me into going to university to earn a professional degree. I stopped training by my second year, then stopped performing by my third. I centered my focus on completing my degree and building a related career. All the while my family kept performing and volunteering until 2020.
My ambition as a business professional continued to grow, leading me to LA to pursue a great career opportunity. Despite my success as a young professional, I desired to be back in the air. This desire led me to training at a few facilities and even setting up a back yard rig to train on. Right as I was beginning to feel ready to join another circus, to reenter the circus world. The world world was hit by something that didn’t care whether an individual aspired or not. The virus took people who aspired, who dreamt and who also had goals. The virus broke families and even spilt humanity in half. For many, the only way to live through this pandemic was to find a passion to cultivate.
Circus was mine.
Circus will muffle the sounds of what feels like constant chaos in the world. Circus will allow for me to appreciate my luck and my life.
I’d like to fly again for myself, and for those that can’t come back down.
Circus is me & I am Circus.
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